Just because you feel hopeless right now doesn’t mean it is going to last. One thing I have learned in life is that all emotions and thoughts rise and fall. There is no guarantee that good feelings will last.
But we hardly apply the same principle over bad emotions. In fact, I would admit that I am among the many who loves to cling to bad episodes, feel hopeless and remain there for a very long time.
However, regardless how bad things are, life will show that it is impossible to remain that way, unless you work hard to make it stay the same. And indeed, by default we are programmed to do that. Unless we decide to reinvent our life and change our ways, we will never be able to use our problems as catalyst for success.
That is why developing the skill to reinvent yourself constantly solves many issues. Our ability to reinvent ourselves (our lives) determines the length of time we stay stuck in the bad feelings. A lot of bad experiences taught me how to change and what the meaning of change really is. I did not just roll with the punches, I fought back.
If you are feeling hopeless, here are a dozen ways that can help you through reinventing journey:
1. Desire for change
If change is your true desire then you need to genuinely want it. Otherwise you will be falsely reinventing yourself that may just lead to more issues. Do not try to reinvent yourself trying to copy another person who may have mentioned they wanted to change. Be genuine about your desire and do it not for anyone else but yourself.
2. Breakdown your tasks
The difference between going through a steady and fast reinventing journey and that which takes a long time is learning how to prioritize. Dedicate more time towards tasks contributing to your long term goal. Multitasking is great, but it can cause feeling stressed and stress is the major precursor of feelings of hopelessness. In the midst of reinventing yourself understand that you have a choice, enjoy the change or be stressed about the change.
3. Begin collapsing old routines
It is difficult to break all your usual routines at once. Proper reinvention does not require immediate changes. In fact, immediate changes that you force your mind into can cause you to further avoid change. Sounds familiar? This is the case for most new year’s resolution. Resolutions applied immediately will most likely be dropped and only revisited in times of regret.
Begin collapsing routines by choosing one aspect of an unproductive routine to change. For example, indulging in unnecessary talks, one efficient way to break this routine is choose an alternative activity. Maybe choose a new hobby that would work towards your reinvention and choose to do it in times when you are most likely invited by others.
4. Right people = right decision
How right or how wrong the people you surround yourself with is actually relative to how you picture your ideal self. If you want to be successful then you have to cut your ties with people whose mindsets works against abundance and success. Harsh? Well it may be quite a harsh decision, but we have to admit at some point that mindsets are contagious.
If you cannot avoid engaging with the people you consider limiting you, learn ways to shield yourself from their negativities. A few minutes a day devoted to reflecting on interactions with them can help you protect your transformation journey.
5. Learn new skills required by your future
Whether it is a few hours a day reading a blog like this or picking up a book required to keep you motivated and learn new skills to improve yourself, DO IT!
Knowledge is never a waste of time and is necessary at any point in time. For example, you wish to transform your life to become a successful entrepreneur. You may begin to learn entrepreneurial skills even you are still trapped in a 9 to 5 job. Learning only after you quit your current job is career suicide.
6. Find a mentor
Life itself is a mentor. If you feel like enrolling in life coaching is a bit of a stretch in terms of budget, you can find an author whose work you can follow. A mentor doesn’t have to only be a coach. There are many heroes out there you can align with and learn from without spending a penny.
Or maybe you know someone, a friend or an acquaintance. Some people who are truly good at what they do, do not hesitate at mentoring others. Often they might do it for free for those who have genuine desires to reinvent their lives and become successful.
There is NOT one direct path towards anything in life. In the course of reinventing yourself, you will find that the path is zigzag, curvy and often standing on crossroads. Do not be afraid to take a turn, unless it is turning back going back to the old you. Experiment with your failures and vow to never look at them as the END of everything.
Experiment with how you look, with your lifestyle and feel which one brings out the best in you. Key is, never stop experimenting, for if you do, you stop reinventing and that means feeling hopeless forever. And you do not want that for sure.
8. Always be honest
Be honest to yourself all the time. Time to begin talking to others with sincere honesty as well. Hoping that you learned how to cut ties with those you cannot trust or those who are not genuine to you. Be honest with a handful of people about your struggles, but also be honest with yourself.
There are so many life teachings out there that will teach you how to mask your feelings of failure with unrealistic views. Detach from those, if it encourages pretending, then it is a false life teaching. To achieve success requires an honest approach to reality.
9. There is no growth in your comfort zone
Consider your comfort zone as dark cave. Navigate towards success outside the darkness. Only by stepping out of your comfort zone will you be able to gain new experiences, pursue opportunities and most importantly, LEARN.
10. Use your past only for evaluation
Totally disengaging from your past would mean not considering valuable resources found only there. Besides, your past is a big part of your identity, no matter how others convince you it is not, it is impossible to be who you are now and how you want to be without a past to back it up.
You cannot simply exist now as a new person without a past. Most life coaching styles fall short in making people understand this, this may result to creating more gaps between understanding the nature of self and reality.
However, what you should know of that past is that it has no direct bearing to your future. In other words, if you use your past as your resources of data for evaluating current decisions, that means you don’t cling onto it. You cannot discard the past and its entirety however you can change its main function in your decision making.
11. Fund your reinvention
Begin to allocate little amounts for reinventing your life. You see, you cannot totally reinvent without having to consider even a small budget. From how you dress, what you eat and who you hang out with, will require a little spending. I guess this can only go wrong if you are investing so much on material reinvention and less on your inner changes.
12. Small steps leads to greater leaps
Take small steps and enjoy your baby steps before you jump. I wish I knew this when I was younger and perhaps my transitions in my career wouldn’t have been so difficult. We crave for changes, but we must understand that changes are best applied efficiently while befriending time. Drastic changes that defies time is volatile in nature. I learned the hard way.